Hands-On Gaining

Although most of you were probably thinking "Hmm.. I'd like to put my hands on a few gainers.." I don't mean like that. I'm talking about the interaction between gainers and their encouragers and admirers.

With my latest videos, I've tried to make an effort of replying to every single comment I get, no matter how short; even "Cool" gets a reply. The reason why I do this is because I figure if people take the time to jack off to comment and subscribe to my videos, I should take time to respond and thank them for that. Often I try to talk to other gainers but there's never any response, or at least one with any amount of substance to it.. such as how you try to talk to someone about something other than gaining, but they show know interest. You know what I'm talking about. I mean, sure, there might be a few people that you might want to just stay away from, but the attitude of even "You're not a gainer and if you are, you're not bigger than me so you're not worth the time" some have is just.. stupid, for lack of better terms.

I don't know why I'm ranting but I just feel as if there's enough assholes in the world so why is it that the majority of those I try to talk to within this community like that as well (not so much for not responding, mind you.. just when they respond and expect worship). I guess what I'm trying to get at is to challenge other gainers who take the time to read my ramblings to respond and appreciate their viewers more. Sure, the relationship between the video creator and the video viewer is sexual at its most basic level, but who knows? Maybe you might find someone who has a lot of common interests asides from bellies. I've met quite a few good friends over the years like Elfstone0818, thornman1990, charlodu15, sumprsn, BiggerIshBetter and Ozzyanddrixfan and more recently 7teen160, FattyGamerGainer and others who don't have videos to name a few. And if I've bored you all or if you're thinking "Well this is idealistic at best; there's always going to be assholes", I'm sorry for boring you AND I'm aware I'm being idealistic.. I was just conveying my thoughts and borderline frustration with how fake people are.. and not just within the gainer world but the entirety of humankind as well.

In other news, I might be going to visit a fellow gainer who is relatively nearby this spring break. And yes, perhaps I can coerce him to make a video with me or two.. or five. But it's all still being planned. So, fingers crossed. You can find his blog here

Also: I woke up and stepped on the scale this morning and it read 171 pounds. I suppose since I've been continuously eating and drinking protein shakes non-stop, that might have something to do with it. Strange though.. whenever I jack off do dirty things by myself, I used to always feel guilty about wanting to get fatter. Now, I have this.. primal urge to find the most fattening things in the house and stuff myself. Well.. I suppose I can thank my encouragers for that. =]

Finally some self-esteem

So.. after my 18th birthday (which was a little bit ago in January).. things started to look up in terms of how I viewed myself and the world. With being 18 came the freedom of not having my controlling mother dictate my assets in the bank under her name as a custodian or have her use me as leverage in court for more unrightful child support money.. but all of my mother's drama aside, her problems are no longer my own.

Having saved up enough money when I was sixteen.. I've began my treatments for laser hair removal for my face. I always was told I look a lot older than what I am.. and having always felt like an adult due to my mother's alcoholism and my father's depression at the time rendering them.. not useless, but not effective parents.. I have felt world weary for most of my short life. Now, people mistake me for younger than I am.. and that is a good feeling. People ask me what if I want a beard later in life.. but.. I figure that.. no matter what anyone has.. they will always covet what they don't.. even if what they now have is what they once wanted.. if that makes sense.

The point of this blog isn't to rant about how bad my life is; it's far from bad, especially compared to someone who would live in Africa, the Middle East.. or someone with a physical or mental chronic illness.. it is just that I have finally come to terms with most of my demons. However, I am asking for the help of any and all of those who read this..

I'm trying to save up for laser hair removal for my chest and stomach.. since my shaving has begun to irritate my skin and waxing just causes infections because of my poor circulation (how this works is that because there's not as much blood moving around, the dead cells and dirt that fills the empty pores is left to stagnate).. I will have a counter on the side of my blog that will count off how much money I have going towards the treatments and the goal. Now, I'm not trying to whine or complain.. sure, I could suck it up and live with it, but each person has his right to be happy, eh? So I figured I'd ask and see if anyone would be willing to help out.. and considering the minds of men often work with "well what's in it for me" is that.. if I don't have to have to shave.. I don't have to worry about tearing up my skin.. no tearing up my skin means I'll be more willing to make videos.. and now being 18.. I'm a little more.. adventurous, I guess. =] No, not meaning x-rated.. but.. those who donate, I will be willing to repay.

But don't feel obligated. It's sorta.. you rub my belly, I rub yours, sorta deal. =] All salesmanship aside, for those who have frequented this page, just know that I'm feeling a lot better about myself.. sadly though, I've lost around ten pounds from my medication I'm taking for my ear infections.. makes me sick after I eat.. but.. I'm a social person.. I'm afraid to gain by myself..