DrBastiodon: My Little Bro

So, looking back on my first semester to college, I joined a fraternity (if you can't tell by my constant mentioning of it on my page XD) and a lot of what I've learned I applied to my life.. though I never expected to apply part of it to gaining. Let me esplain.

I stumbled upon a gainer called DrBastiodon on YouTube and reading his page and video descriptions triggered this little voice in my mind saying "Wow.. this kid's pretty cool.. I gotta talk to him." So I shot him a message and we traded screen names and we started talking earlier this week. What really freaked me out is how eerily similar he and I are.. and even more so.. how all of the insecurities I had about gaining that I've wrote about before have all melted away. So, in true fratboy fashion, I asked him if he'd want to be my little bro (for those who aren't familiar with fraternities, initiated members who are interested in mentoring pledges form a big bro/little bro bond and these combinations are usually selected due to personality similarities and shared interests) as he asked me to be his big bro. Now, maybe it's really corny--and admittedly, it is--but he's helped me really get into gaining and not be afraid of how I see myself.. in fact, I have an epic self-esteem now which was the final piece of my puzzle of finding stability in my life as a whole (after this semester, I've found awesome friends at university, made awesome bonds with my brothers, and my relationship with my mom, step-dad, and grandparents is as strong as ever.. so all I needed was to love myself finally after years of criticising and self-loathing). I digress..

Along with the bond I've forged with him, I've come up with these simple rules that we--at least I do--plan on following:

1) If one of us falls behind, the other encourages the other to catch up. We want to gain *together* and, albeit over the internet, it's just easier to know he's helping me out, even at the expense of his own gain, but he'd know I'd do the same for him.

2) If offered food, always say yes UNLESS you don't like the food. Whenever my mom asks me I'm hungry, even if I just ate without her knowing, I say yes. It's beginning to pay off, I think. Also, clear the plate. Every bit is extra calories.

3) If you're hungry, eat, no matter how soon you just got done eating. Lately I've noticed that after half an hour to an hour when I was done eating, I'm hungry again. So, I indulge myself.. and strangely get turned on and more willing to eat more and more.

But yeah.. hopefully this summer, he and I are gonna hang out.. and provided he wants tooooo.. we might make a video or two. XD But don't quote me on that. Regardless.. if you guys were wondering how I was doing, I'm doing awesome at school, life, gaining (at least I hope so), and just.. yeah. I've found my place finally.

SOOOO.. in other unrelated news, I hope everyone has an epic Christmas/Holiday break and for those who are gaining, try out the above rules if you want and see if they work. Find someone to gain with though.. it helps a lot to have someone who understands who to make sense of what you're feeling. And once you're set, just run with it.

If you guys wanna talk, just send me a message on t3h youtubez. Again, happy holidays. :D Eat big.

COLLEGE IS AWESOME

So.. I'm going to gain in college. There's so much food here that it's gonna happen regardless of whether or not I try to gain. I mean.. what's there to not like? Great friends, great food, hot shirtless boys everywhere and yes.. some of them are chubby.

I've re-evaluated a lot in my life; I'm doing a lot better now that I'm far away from home because I don't have to deal with the bullshit there anymore. The only true insecurity that I have left remaining is how hairy I am but one of my friends suggested this thing called "Tria" which is a home laser hair removal.. gun, I guess you could say and when I asked a few people about it who have used it, they love it. I mean, I don't want to be hairless.. I just want less hair. On the plus side, it's $500 which the laser lasts long enough to remove 90% of the hair of one's entire body.. as opposed to the $6000 I would be spending on treatments for my stomach and chest. So I'm going to change my goal thing on the side.

If anyone wants to help out, feel free to. I'm not going to beg for money but I will say that one of the reasons I don't like gaining is because I don't like the hair on my stomach and chest.. and I think it'd look even worse if I was pudgy.

I will try to post videos at least monthly showing my progress since my roommate's gone every weekend. =] If you have any requests, feel free to ask.

Also, thanks for supporting me. It means a lot.

Photo Update

A few new pictures since I said I wouldn't make a new video until either A) another of my videos reaches 10,000 views OR B) when I reach 1400 subscribers. So.. here are a few pictures to tide you over.

I think I've gained, but I don't know how much since I have no scale (step-mom kicked me out for finding out I still talk to my actual mother on the phone.. how fucked up is that).. so I live by my friend for now 'til college in August. Also, I'll be moving my furniture and stuff into the basement so I'll actually have privacy.

But yeah. =] Tell me what you think.

Hands-On Gaining

Although most of you were probably thinking "Hmm.. I'd like to put my hands on a few gainers.." I don't mean like that. I'm talking about the interaction between gainers and their encouragers and admirers.

With my latest videos, I've tried to make an effort of replying to every single comment I get, no matter how short; even "Cool" gets a reply. The reason why I do this is because I figure if people take the time to jack off to comment and subscribe to my videos, I should take time to respond and thank them for that. Often I try to talk to other gainers but there's never any response, or at least one with any amount of substance to it.. such as how you try to talk to someone about something other than gaining, but they show know interest. You know what I'm talking about. I mean, sure, there might be a few people that you might want to just stay away from, but the attitude of even "You're not a gainer and if you are, you're not bigger than me so you're not worth the time" some have is just.. stupid, for lack of better terms.

I don't know why I'm ranting but I just feel as if there's enough assholes in the world so why is it that the majority of those I try to talk to within this community like that as well (not so much for not responding, mind you.. just when they respond and expect worship). I guess what I'm trying to get at is to challenge other gainers who take the time to read my ramblings to respond and appreciate their viewers more. Sure, the relationship between the video creator and the video viewer is sexual at its most basic level, but who knows? Maybe you might find someone who has a lot of common interests asides from bellies. I've met quite a few good friends over the years like Elfstone0818, thornman1990, charlodu15, sumprsn, BiggerIshBetter and Ozzyanddrixfan and more recently 7teen160, FattyGamerGainer and others who don't have videos to name a few. And if I've bored you all or if you're thinking "Well this is idealistic at best; there's always going to be assholes", I'm sorry for boring you AND I'm aware I'm being idealistic.. I was just conveying my thoughts and borderline frustration with how fake people are.. and not just within the gainer world but the entirety of humankind as well.

In other news, I might be going to visit a fellow gainer who is relatively nearby this spring break. And yes, perhaps I can coerce him to make a video with me or two.. or five. But it's all still being planned. So, fingers crossed. You can find his blog here

Also: I woke up and stepped on the scale this morning and it read 171 pounds. I suppose since I've been continuously eating and drinking protein shakes non-stop, that might have something to do with it. Strange though.. whenever I jack off do dirty things by myself, I used to always feel guilty about wanting to get fatter. Now, I have this.. primal urge to find the most fattening things in the house and stuff myself. Well.. I suppose I can thank my encouragers for that. =]

Finally some self-esteem

So.. after my 18th birthday (which was a little bit ago in January).. things started to look up in terms of how I viewed myself and the world. With being 18 came the freedom of not having my controlling mother dictate my assets in the bank under her name as a custodian or have her use me as leverage in court for more unrightful child support money.. but all of my mother's drama aside, her problems are no longer my own.

Having saved up enough money when I was sixteen.. I've began my treatments for laser hair removal for my face. I always was told I look a lot older than what I am.. and having always felt like an adult due to my mother's alcoholism and my father's depression at the time rendering them.. not useless, but not effective parents.. I have felt world weary for most of my short life. Now, people mistake me for younger than I am.. and that is a good feeling. People ask me what if I want a beard later in life.. but.. I figure that.. no matter what anyone has.. they will always covet what they don't.. even if what they now have is what they once wanted.. if that makes sense.

The point of this blog isn't to rant about how bad my life is; it's far from bad, especially compared to someone who would live in Africa, the Middle East.. or someone with a physical or mental chronic illness.. it is just that I have finally come to terms with most of my demons. However, I am asking for the help of any and all of those who read this..

I'm trying to save up for laser hair removal for my chest and stomach.. since my shaving has begun to irritate my skin and waxing just causes infections because of my poor circulation (how this works is that because there's not as much blood moving around, the dead cells and dirt that fills the empty pores is left to stagnate).. I will have a counter on the side of my blog that will count off how much money I have going towards the treatments and the goal. Now, I'm not trying to whine or complain.. sure, I could suck it up and live with it, but each person has his right to be happy, eh? So I figured I'd ask and see if anyone would be willing to help out.. and considering the minds of men often work with "well what's in it for me" is that.. if I don't have to have to shave.. I don't have to worry about tearing up my skin.. no tearing up my skin means I'll be more willing to make videos.. and now being 18.. I'm a little more.. adventurous, I guess. =] No, not meaning x-rated.. but.. those who donate, I will be willing to repay.

But don't feel obligated. It's sorta.. you rub my belly, I rub yours, sorta deal. =] All salesmanship aside, for those who have frequented this page, just know that I'm feeling a lot better about myself.. sadly though, I've lost around ten pounds from my medication I'm taking for my ear infections.. makes me sick after I eat.. but.. I'm a social person.. I'm afraid to gain by myself..